Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I'm not crazy!



Today I thought I was going to lose my mind. I felt like I had a million things to do and Sweetpea was testing me, needing me, ripping the house to shreds, etc. and therefore I couldn't accomplish one single thing!

I decided to take a shower, and it took only 3 hours for me to complete that process. First, she had to come into the bathroom while I was in there, which made the shower longer because I had to keep telling her, "no, don't flush the toilet, no, don't put the flattening iron in the water." You get the picture. Then, while I was getting dressed she figured out how to get all the way out of her pajamas AND DIAPER and started running around the freezing cold house naked. She, for one, thought it was hilarious. I got her dressed, and settled down and we went to the living room to eat, and watch a little Blues Clues. While I was trying to do my hair, she got up to go play and slipped on something on the hard wood, fell down and started crying. I was like, "what the heck did you slip on?....oh, a puddle...is that pee???" Yeah, she had peed on the floor while she was running around naked! UUUUUGGG. Do you ever feel like saying to your child, "mommy needs a little space right now, and I think it would do you some good too, sooooo you play in here, and I'll be on the computer." This is how she was all day. I felt like every other word out of my mouth was "NO." I kept picturing what my life would be like on a day like this with a newborn stuck on my boob to add to the madness!

Finally I escaped next door to bible study. We listened to a Beth Moore study, which discussed 1 Timothy 1:7 - For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.
She was talking to me when she said the devil is after your mind and wants you to feel like your losing it. Oh wow, that is exactly what I needed. I almost didn't make it tonight because Sweetpea was hanging on to my leg with her runny nose when I was trying to leave. I'm so glad I did. Faith drives the sound mind and I am going to need lots and lots of it in a few more months (God is probably prepping me now so that I understand I need it EVERY day). What a blessing these studies, my neighbor and all the girls in the group have become! I feel like my family is where we are supposed to be right now.

When I got home, Sweetface had fed Sweetpea, we gave her a bath, she cried when we took her out because she wanted to draw in the tub (oh yeah, she only had a 1 hour nap today and she usually sleeps at least 2), I wrestled with her to get her pajamas on, read her a book...and then, she closed the book, put her arms around me and without me saying anything to her said, "I love you (she says "I Lou")." She curled up on my lap and passed out! She usually doesn't fall asleep until she is in her crib, but I think she was also worn out from the day we had. That little girl made my heart melt and almost (ALMOST) forget about the long day. I was reminded tonight, that I have been given the mind of Christ, which is SOUND and sane. Panic never leads to rational decisions, so I need to relax, take a deep breath and know that He is in control. He has blessed me with my girl that I've been dreaming of since I was a child and then again with the baby on the way. Parenting can be draining and hectic (and I don't even know the half of it yet), but boy is it rewarding.

Thank GOD that Sweetpea is not like this everyday. I think it was a combo of her runny nose (she hates it), her nose getting chapped, our house being cold, and being cooped up all day. But anyway, I am happy we got through it, I have a few moments to myself and will be ready for a new day at 6:30 am.

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